You know it is amazing how people answering this question are experts in firearms, sex, natural disasters, horse-riding, hacking, explosions, exploration of Universe, and many other things I hope I will avoid in my near and distant future, but…
But being father I have watched a child's behaviour from a close distance, and I can assure that I would really appreciate if some screenwriters helped me raise these little devils into perfect understanding angels I am seeing in the movies.
I desperately need having such nice children. The two I obtained have some defects from production. I have to feed them, comfort them, reprimand them, and more often than not, they absolutely do not follow my requests, no matter what voice or tone I use.
But what is the worst, they
do refuse to fall asleep willingly after I tell them how much I love them. According to movies, I would expect them to hug me back and proclaim their eternal love for their awesome progenitor. Sadly, they do not display such tender feelings, on contrary, they do not even respect my occasional polite hints when I would like to have some rest.
Unfortunately, far from the angelic beings presented in Hollywood films, the only resemblance to supernatural features I could recognize in my children was that of gargoyles that can
be found on gothic cathedrals. It was few years ago, about that time when my cute children have nothing better to do than to scream for an hour for no clear reason.
The only movie I can think of which depicts children correctly would be The exorcist. All the vomiting, yelling, tantrum throwing, yes, this is the most realistic picture of children I have seen so far.
Perhaps the best nanny to find should be a hardened catholic priest who does not mind facing the Devil.
Written for Quora